Open Your Mouth! - Just don't jinx yourself...

 During this past week, I have been trying to focus on teaching first and foremost by the Spirit. During my lessons with my "investigators," I have often felt rather panicked in the process of frantically trying to understand what the investigator is telling us and how in the world to answer them. Due to this stress, the Spirit has sometimes felt less present than I would have liked. At one point during our normal class activities, one of my instructors said something to the effect of "It's more important to speak with the Spirit than it is to speak perfect or even really good Tagalog." I have tried to take these words to heart, and have noticed some awesome blessings as a result. Instead trying to cram as much input and output Tagalog into my brain as possible during the lesson, I have been focusing on keeping a continual prayer for guidance and power through the Spirit in my heart and mind instead. As I've practiced this skill, I truly have felt a huge increase in the Spirit witnessing of the truths that Elder Wilder and I are sharing. At one point, I swear the feeling just about blasted me out of my chair. Additionally, my Tagalog really hasn't gotten any worse during the lessons either, so I suppose I'm really supposed to learn to trust in God to guide my words, instead of coming up with everything myself. Not something that I'm necessarily used to or good at, but something that I definitely want to continue working on. Besides, God is much better at speaking to the heart than I am.

 Last Sunday, the new leadership assignments were being given, and lo and behold Elder Wilder and I are now our Zone Leaders. (We completely jinxed ourselves over that one. Should have kept our mouths closed...) Since my district was the only one not leaving, everyone therein received a leadership assignment of some kind, so we have all suddenly acquired more responsibilities, which have proven to be both challenging and a blessing. Monday through Wednesday morning, we were saying goodbye to the members of our zone who were headed out into the field. This was really a pretty sad experience for me, since I very likely won't be seeing any of them again (none were headed to my same mission) and I really liked all of them. There were many hugs exchanged (only with the Elders) and somehow Elder Wilder and I ended up with absolutely copious amounts of snacks as the leaving missionaries tried to get rid of all their perishable food at once. I'll miss all the departed missionaries a lot, but I'm so happy they get to go out and fulfill their purpose as missionaries of the Lord!

Wednesday afternoon, my district had the opportunity to host brand new missionaries incoming to the   MTC, which I thoroughly enjoyed. I got to know three new people, one of which turned out to be in my zone. Thankfully none of the Elders I hosted had a 100 lb suitcase, which was apparently a problem for Elder Wilder. Wednesday  evening, we were in charge of giving an orientation presentation to the almost 40 new missionaries in our zone. The meeting actually went over quite well despite it both the presenters and the listeners being quite pagod (tired). This morning, we were able to take the new missionaries to the Provo temple for the first time, which was extremely nice after the many preceding moments of craziness. Despite all of the running around Elder Wilder and I have had to do with our new responsibilities, I have enjoyed getting to know my new zone members little by little. I can remember most of their (last) names now, and I'm looking forward to getting to spend more time with them. They have been pretty obedient and easy to work with thus far, so I really have been blessed in that way.


  As I've pondered on the best way to try and help and support these new missionaries, I've realized that it is going to require me getting out of my comfort zone, talking to people more that I normally might and really trying to get to know each of them as much as possible. As a somewhat quiet and calm person by nature, this is not exactly one of my strong suits. But I know that as a missionary, central to my purpose is helping, loving and uplifting others, especially those whom I am supposed to lead. So I have committed to open my mouth, even when I'm tired or don't really want to try and chat. I definitely won't be perfect at it, but I'm going to try my very best. Likewise, I know that each of you have people in your life who are in need of your personal helping, loving and uplifting influence. You have so much potential to do good, and I would hate for any of that potential to go unused. So I invite you to talk to everyone you can; take time to talk, be friendly and be kind. If you do this, I know the Lord will bless you for your efforts to follow His example in loving all of God's children.
    
Thank you for any and all prayers and good thoughts that have been sent my way. I hope you each have a wonderful week! 

Love, Elder Dickison

Awesome Experiences and an Uncertain Future...

 I'll admit, I had originally planned to just title each email with the week of my mission that had elapsed, i.e. week 3, week 4, etc.... But then I realized that would require me to count slowly to 100+ weeks, and I just don't think I can do that to myself...so ya.

    Well, I've almost reached the halfway point of my MTC stay, and while I feel like I've learned so much, the more I learn, the more I realize that really learning to be a missionary is going to be a long process. A process that both excites me, slightly terrifies me and is stretching me in new ways every day. But in the midst of all the many unknowns, I trust that the Lord will help me to perform His work.

     On Monday of this week, I had a small but awesome miracle occur. My district was having our first experiences teaching someone who was not a fake investigator. The MTC had several local volunteers (Tagalog speaking Returned Missionaries) come and we were supposed to teach/help them...sa Tagalog. Elder Wilder and I had prepared a pretty good lesson on Faith... which we didn't really end up using much. Neither of the RM sisters we taught really felt they needed any help as far as faith was concerned, so we improvised, relying on ang Espiritu Santo to save our discussion from self-destruction. While neither of the discussions were perfect, one of the RM's shared with us some struggles she was having trying to help her younger sister. This younger sister didn't have much of a testimony and the RM we were talking to was making efforts to help her want a testimony. While I didn't have much useful advice to offer, I did feel led by the Spirit to promise this RM sister that her efforts would not be a waste of time, and that something good would come of it. In retrospect, that promise sounds kind of vague, but it seems that that was what she needed to hear at that time. A little later that day, I heard through the grapevine that that RM had really felt impressed and uplifted by the promise the Spirit instructed me to give, and it was a huge witness to me that I can and will be guided in this work.

     As frustrating as trying to learn to teach a complex gospel in a somewhat bizzare language sometimes is, I have truly been blessed with wonderful teachers. Yesterday, my district was having a really rough time dealing with high expectations and feeling they they were constantly falling behind. I myself wasn't doing too bad, but I was really feeling for my friends. The stress and pressure was gnawing pretty badly at them. Thankfully our teacher perceived that most of the district was having a bad day, and completely turned the planned schedule around so we could discuss what was going on and so that he could offer some advice and support. This change of plans greatly impressed me as I observed that this teacher understood his role as a mentor and friend just as much as that of a teacher. While the challenges ahead are still daunting, I am so grateful to have been blessed with wonderful people to guide me along the way.

     This upcoming Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday, everybody in my zone, excluding my own district, will be headed out from the MTC. Most of those leaving unfortunately haven't gotten their visas to the Philippines yet, so they were reassigned temporarily somewhere in the States. I'm hoping my district has a little better luck when we leave. With the loss of most of the people currently in my zone comes the blessing of getting new missionaries to fill and....overfill the vacant spaces. There's about 24 missionaries leaving from my zone the coming week, and supposedly there's going to be around 40 brand new missionaries taking their place in our zone. YIPE! Ordinarily I would simply be excited to get to know lots of new people, but with the way things stand, there's only two Elder companionships in my district- mine and a trio. This means there is a 50% chance Elder Wilder and I will end up as Zone Leaders training a whopping load of new missionaries. We've tried to figure out who we could pay off to guarantee this doesn't happen, but thus far we haven't had any success. I guess life is never boring when you're in the service of the Lord...for better or...not quite as better. :) Regardless of what happens, I trust that the Lord will guide me and those I serve with.

     I hope you have all had a wonderful week, and have been blessed in the good things you have each done. This upcoming week I invite you to look for blessings that come into you life every day. I am coming to understand more and more that the more I notice the hand of the Lord in my life, the happier I feel about it. I have faith that this is true for everyone, so please take time to notice the things you are being blessed with. Peace be with you til next week. :)

Love, Elder Dickison

P.S. I apologize for the lack of pictures; the computer lab I'm using to write is not being very friendly towards my SD card. Hopefully next week I'll have it figured out. 

Day 10- Never a dull moment at the MTC :)

Well, to sum up the MTC in two simple words, Holy Cows! Holy because the Spirit truly is amazingly strong here, and every day is filled will great opportunities to learn the work of the Lord. Cows because there is waaay tooo much dairy food available and tempting at the MTC.

Anyway, it has been a wonderful week for me here in Provo. Definitely a difficult one as well, but mostly difficult in ways that have helped me to grow. 

Almost every day my companion, Elder Wilder, and I have had the...ummm...opportunity to teach a practice investigator named Mary Grace. This has been simultaneously an incredibly difficult and highly instructive experience. Our study of the language has come along to the point the we can speak a lot Tagalog words, pero forming complete Tagalog sentences is still quite beyond us. Just about everything in Tagalog grammar is reversed compared to English grammar, making translating English sentences in Tagalog quite the trick. I can tell I'm improving every day, but for the time being, speaking anything meaningful is quite difficult. 

     The first real lesson Elder Wilder and I tried to teach, we were determined to try and speak only Tagalog to our "investigator". It seemed like a reasonable goal since we were able to speak pretty well as we practiced the lesson in advance. When we got into the lesson however, everything we had practiced vanished out of our heads and neither of us had any idea what to say. It didn't help that we could only barely understand what Mary Grace was saying to us. Needless to say that lesson essentially turned into the longest staring contest of my life, and I'm pretty sure the MTC employee playing the part of Mary Grace was done with us after only two of the twelve minutes the "lesson" lasted. Ugh...never again...  Thankfully, every lesson after that one has gone much better. Elder Wilder and I now speak very much Tag-lish - mostly Tagalog with just enough English thrown in to make sense. Mary Grace has been slowly but surely progressing as we've taught her about God, prophets, ang Aklat ni Mormon and the Restoration. I have very quickly had to learn to pray constantly during the lesson for the Spirit to guide our clumsy words and touch Mary Grace's heart, in spite of our inadequacies. 

     During the past week, I've been able to listen to multiple amazing talks that have uplifted and taught me. Sunday evening, I was able to watch a devotional given by Elder Bednar during a past Christmas at the MTC. The talk, entitled "The Character of Christ" was easily one of the most profound things I have ever heard, and I enjoyed it greatly. For our Sunday devo, Sister Sherri Dew spoke to us and Tuesday we were blessed to hear from Elder Gong (the Apostle). Both gave awesome messages, and I enjoyed getting to be in the same room as an apostle once again. A recurring theme throughout all these messages has been one of turning outward to love and serve others, rather than turning inwards when things get difficult. While this is one of the trickiest things to accomplish in this life, I know that it is possible, and even essential to work on developing this characteristic every day. As I've been learning, this is what it means to truly follow the Savior. 

     As I continue to get to know my companion, Elder Wilder, I am continually impressed by the many dynamics of his character. He has learned a lot from his diversified life experience working different jobs and meeting lots of different kinds of people. But most of all, I can feel that he has a firm testimony of Jesus Christ and His gospel and truly desires to share the truth he has obtained. This makes me so happy for him and grateful to have been given an awesome companion.

All of the members of my MTC district are headed to the Philippines, though only three of us are going to Baguio. Other destinations include the Urdaneta and Kawayan missions, as well as a couple others I can't remember the name of at the moment. My zone is also all Tagalog speaking, with probably a dozen or so different mission destinations. Currently our zone in composed of about 26 or so missionaries, with most of the having been at the MTC for 3 and a half weeks. Two and half weeks from now, Everyone in the zone except my district will leave, and apparently about 40 new missionaries will be joining us. So my little district will be training a huge pool of new missionaries. Yay!

     Well, I've probably rambled on quite long enough, so I'll close. I love being here at the MTC- it is incredibly difficult, but I can feel myself growing daily, and the Spirit testifies to me daily that I am where I'm supposed to be. :) I'm so grateful for each of you, and I pray every day that the Lord will watch over you.

Sincerely,
Elder Dickison

Day 3- I'm Alive!

 Friday, June 1st, 2018

I'm still alive! :P I haven't died since yesterday! But more than that, I am actually doing pretty amazingly well.  The first few days here have been a pretty crazy whirlwind. Apparently things are supposed to get calmer and more organized in the coming week, but thus far the schedule has been all over the place. Honestly, I think the missionaries would be better off if they were on a normal schedule their first week and then they started throwing other meetings in...but what do I know? :P  

After parting ways with (the family) I found myself in a classroom with an MTC teacher, Brother Hill, rattling off nothing but Tagalog at me. It really was like the first day of German class all over again. My district continued to file in, until we had all of us- 3 sister companionships, my Elder companionship and an Elder trioship. Apparently trios are much more popular than I thought, since I think I see about 50 or so trioships every day. My companion's name is Elder Wilder and we get along quite well; he's willing to work, thoughtful, and patient.

 The food honestly reminds me quite a bit of the cafeterias at USU...not mind blowing, but not the elementary cafeterias either. I haven't gotten sick from it yet, but only time will tell. We did get to attend the temple this morning, and I got to see the final temple movie that I was missing out on before. It was wonderful to be in the temple again so soon. 

The language study has been intense. There's a huge list of words to memorize and Brother Hill has wasted no time in throwing confusing grammar concepts at us...but I still have faith that I'll be able to learn the language one day at a time. Thus far, I have loved the spiritual strength and peace I feel.

Thank you again for your messages!

Love, Elder Dickison